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Eat your heart out, Moscow!

You may have had Angelina Jolie gracing the Kremlin last month but Kyiv triples the star action with Sylvester Stallone, Jason Statham and Dolph Lundgren this weekend. Hollywood’s bad boys will present their new action thriller “The Expendables” and then hit the party.

The movie kicks off across the nation on Aug. 12, dubbed into Ukrainian. The story’s about a diehard group of mercenaries on a mission to depose a villain of a president somewhere in Latin America. Apart from the three machos in Kyiv, the cast of “The Expandables” includes Mickey Rourke, Jet Li, and Arnold Schwarzenegger, among others.

Jean Claude Van Damme was supposed to be in it as well but he couldn’t agree on the geography of the screenplay and dropped out. Never mind, we’ve already seen him twice in Ukraine.

To meet the other big boys, head to Crystal Hall on Aug. 7. We’re yet to figure out what exactly they will be doing there, apart from auctioning off a movie poster with their signatures, which proceeds will go to charity.

But organizers are rushing to put a program together with some popular Ukrainian and Russian bands to entertain the big guests.

Crystal Hall (Dniprovsky Spusk 1), Aug 7 at 11pm, tel. 067 442 92 67 or 288 50 69. Tickets: Hr 500 in a fan zone, $2,500 for a table.